I spend most of my holidays reading books. A part from them are the book entiltle "Aku Terima Nikahnya" by Ustaz Hasrizal Abbdul Jamil and "MEN Are from MARS WOMEN Are from VENUS" by Dr John Gray. I learned a lot. I know. Some of the content are still early for me to digest. But I believe theres nothing wrong in preparing oneself early to face the coming big day of our lives, marriage. Eventually, one will know when he is prepared according to his circumstances. And eventually, one will have to choose someone, to share and be part of his life. The success of a marriage is influenced by an throughout understanding about resonsibilities and feelings towards one another. But the more crucial stage depends on the preparation of oneself to face a marriage and choosing the right one. Tough I must admit the only setback in reading the book is your mind will start wandering around about the subject and it's gonna last quite sometime. The thought might be temporary but the mindset last forever.

Its not hard to see why most of our teenagers or young adults get the wrong idea about relationship. And it's not really about they do not know that their doings are wrong. Its just that they let it be. Staying ignorant of their sins and have fun with the one they seems to like. Most teengers and undergraduates values looks over personalities. And why not if its only for a short period with she or he. Temporary entertainment it would seem. One that wil last so seldom. To feel better when they are lonely. In the end, for whats worth they will look for somebody nice and steadfast on Islam to marry instead.

I have a friend of mine. An ordinary person with little exposure to know about Islam. And yes the person experienced crushes and dates. Like walking, having lunch and watching a movie together. Those were high school life where a teenager are at their most intriging behavior. The period where parents should pay their most intention towards their children development in my opinion. Of course, after finishing school life is different. Studying as an undergraduate at UiTM now, not so long ago we had a little chat on yahoo messanger. At first it was all about hows life is going on campus, and later the talk about relationship made its entry to the frame. My friend needed counseling wandering if there will ever be someone who would guide, and show the way to understanding Islam. How hard it is in the person's place to meet with such person.

From what I learned from the conversation, everyone is faithful to have a guiding partner who knows, wants and able to perform Islam as the way of life. I will say to find the right person mention is only half of the challenge. To be the person that someone will want to marry is the hardest part.

Wanita-wanita yang keji adalah untuk laki-laki yang keji, dan laki-laki yang keji adalah buat wanita-wanita yang keji (pula), dan wanita-wanita yang baik adalah untuk laki-laki yang baik dan laki-laki yang baik adalah untuk wanita-wanita yang baik (pula). An-Nur ayat 26

Some of us after hearing this verse feels discourage. To say that they do not belong to that group of people and thus do not deserve to be with kind loving individuals. Take it as a motivation. With enough courage, one can always change his ways. I always believed that everybody have that feeling to be a better person. Its just a matter of support and motivation. For the best towards his friends and family. And most importantly, towards enslaving himself.

To reflect it upon another situation. When two person who is looking to improve themselve and finding someone kind with strong belief towards Islam happens to meet one another. Both believe they have found the right person. But sadly, due to lack of understanding perhaps, both who are trying so hard seems to stray away from their path. Mistakenly without notice, the intention are goods, but directed to win the heart of someone and not properly directing the intention to Allah.

Of course from all the thing I say, everything is directed back towards me. I myself, is trying to improve my understanding towards this beautiful religion and keep clean of my everyday deeds. And of course, somehow hoping for the right person. But as for the time being, personally, I believe that this is not truly the time to be thinking about relationship. Take this writing as something to ponder. Something that should be reminded from time to time. For we should not lose our focus in what we should truly concentrate on. The time will come insyaAllah. Maybe in the near future or maybe so distantly. Allah knows best. And until that day, hopefully and faithfully, we hope to be a better person each day. Amin....